"Dancing in the park"

                    🎶“Lady hear me tonight,  cuz my feelings is just so right. 🎶

                    🎶 As we danced, by the moonlight, can’t you see you’re my delight”🎶


This song intertwined perfectly with the amazing vibe, the chilli breeze, and the moonlight; everything was beautiful about Auckland last night.

So, I had been waiting to  witness the amazing gig “Dancing in the Park”, which took place in the Albert park last evening. Being  a newbie from a different country, here in Auckland, was the most amazing experience ever. 
So, the event started at around 3 PM, but then again the forgetful person that I am, I lost my room access card. Me and Lily, my Chinese flatmate, had been to the Chinese supermarket earlier to buy vegetables and other kitchen items. I come back and I realised that I do not have the card on the phone cover. Somehow I managed to get a temp card from the security and then there was, my room waiting for me to come back so, that I could dress up and head to Albert park. 
And the kind person that I am, well, I am proud of that so.. high five! So, I gave the security a grapefruit, as I didn’t have anything else to show my gratitude with.
Anyways, I come back to my room and I still cannot find the card. I don’t know, why I did that, but I actually had to pull out the whole wardrobe to find the card.
Trust me, biggest mistake ever! I pulled out everything, only to find that the card is lying right next to me, slightly under the bed.
The frustrated me, folded and kept the clothes back in the cupboard and then, got all sparkly and wore my  all time favourite floral Adidas jacket, my high-waisted jeans shorts, and my pink Timberland boots! I loved the look and I kinda thought, that was the perfect outfit for a gig like that. 
So, Albert park is like, five minutes walk from my place and I headed towards the park looking all decked up for the evening. The moment I reached the top, where the event was going on, I suddenly felt a rush, a rush 🌬of freshly smoked doobies. I thought to my myself, in a way, it's really good because, I was like, what if, today is my chance to finally get to taste the flavour of New Zealand’s so-called organic marijuana. ☘ That's the wild side of doing all the talks, so you don't wanna throw more attention on that.

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So, there were people of all generation playing with vibrant hula hoops. There were people sketching different views of the parks. Some were fascinated in the tantric vibes of yoga and quiet contrast to that, there were others shaking it up to the zestful Zumba songs.  And on the other hand, there were some, who were rolling joints and preparing for the evening. Everything was just amazing to look at and I wondered how peaceful it would  have been for them to sit at the park, puff it up and feel the whole world moving at a slow and peaceful pace. Well, the hypnotic trances that they must be going through were something I really envied. 
Anyways, I went alone as there was no one to accompany me, but I enjoyed a lot, just by being a spectator.  Do you see, how I get distracted every time I talk about the stuff.  The hypnotherapy is working on me through just mere thoughts of it, I guess…🤗
Well, coming back to my story, there were people practising for the big night, as they had told us earlier that, there will be LED, Fire show and Glow Zone after the sunset.  

There were people, dogs, and insects, that were trying to climb up on my legs. I was supposed to bring at least a cloth to sit on; saw how I called myself ‘forgetful’ in the beginning?  The insects were quiet understanding and did no harm to any parts of my body. That’s funny, because, I can imagine my mum yelling at me for sitting on the grass with shorts on. She would have been like, “Get up, you lil' twit, there are insects and they can fuck u up.” Well, she wouldn't use “fuck” but it would mean the same.
I sat there, leaning on a tree, and watched people endlessly. 🌳

Luckily towards the evening, a friend joined me and it was so relaxing to finally have someone to talk to in the park except for the kid, who kept coming up to me for free hugs. The kid was really sweet, but now if I think about it, I don’t really think that that was a kid. I don’t know, Whoever he was, I gave him a lot of hugs and finally when he came again, I wanted to tell him, It was no more free and that, I would  actually start charging him. I ended up hugging him, see, that’s what I hate in me; Its really hard for me to come about with the word “NO”. 💁🏻

Anyways, my friend had come along with a friend and we enjoyed a lot. We  made fun of a lot of people and also there was this old man, who kept throwing the fire rings as us, not literally, though.  I am just fussing about it now, but the ambience was different yesterday, it was so chilled out and relaxing. I wonder the "rush", I mentioned in the beginning of my story, was actually starting to bring out the peaceful side of me too. Whatever side it brought out, it was amazing. We danced a lot and we did “Thabal Chongba” (Manipur’s much-celebrated dance, particularly on a full moon night) and we enjoyed to our hearts content. 👫We somehow got a joint, from somewhere and puffed our souls out and danced under the moonlight to the tunes of Modjo and a lot of  other amazing argentine music with drum beats.

It was one of the best nights, I have ever had in Auckland. We headed towards the road but then, needed to relax for some more time. I lied on my back and could feel the tingling of the grass on my neck and the back of my legs, overlooking the sky tower. The heat vibe from all the dancing and laughing actually blended so perfectly with the chilly April breeze..
                                                                                                                               
                                                                          Best night ever…. 💛

Love, love me❤️

There s a piece of me that wants to love you. Love you like how love is meant to be. 💘
Kiss you like how kisses are suppose to be. 💏
Hug you with a never ending bond. 🙇
Hold you, wishing our hands never parts. 👫

But You were gone, long gone from my life. 👥

Why did you go? I still have to express my feelings, my never ending overflowing feelings for you...😣

Won't you ever come back? Who will wipe and kiss away this pain that I am left with.. 😢

Please change your mind and come back to me. 🙋🏻

Back to my messy life, a life only you can purify. 👾

A life that always longs for your love and nothing else... 🙍🏻

Love don't leave me stranded all alone! 🙏🏻😓😥😪😭

My luckless romance

I was listening to this track called Almost Lover by A fine frenzy, I couldn't help but listen to it over and over again. I feel as if, this song was made for me. The moment I tried to understand the lyrics, we clicked. It laid down every word for me...

I will not write about every sentence that pinches my heart, but there’s one paragraph that messes me up, and it goes on like this:

“I cannot drive the streets at night
I cannot wake up in the morning
without you on my mind
so you're gone and I'm haunted
and I bet you are just fine
did I make it that easy
to walk right in and out of my life?”

Yes, I cannot drive or travel at night without having to think of you. I remember I went to meet him. It was an overnight bus ride. I kept looking out the window, I couldn’t sleep that night. I felt happy that I was going to see him but deep down, I was sad, sad that this happiness will be short-lived; and yes it was...

I won’t say that I wake every day thinking about him, but there has not been a moment when my heart stopped beating for him. I am amazed and shocked at the same time, as to what has come out of me.

He is always gone and I am always haunted by the way my heart beats for him. Always haunted by the way I am being treated. Haunted by the way, he says something and does something. Always haunted by the way I feel so FUCKED UP when I miss him...

He is fine and I am fine too. I am the FINEST girl in this whole world if you know what I mean.. I can act like I am totally over him but I am so messed up in my heart.

Yes, I make it darn easy for him to just walk in and out of my life. I make it easy for him, not because that’s how I want things to be. That memory even though short lived, will be the best of my life and him, always has been.  

I am trying not to think about you, but my thoughts are filled with your memories.  I am trying not to meet you, but my heart is unstoppable when it comes to you.  I am trying not to kiss you but I can’t control my feelings when I am with you. I am trying everything to make you fade away slowly from my life, but I can’t.

Or am I not trying harder? Do I like it like this? Do I want things to be unchanged? Do I want my heart to always beat for him? Do I want these feelings to linger forever?

I think I am scared to let him go. I think I am scared to not think about him. I think I am scared to not have butterflies in my tummy when I see him. I think I am scared to un-love him.

Am I being too selfish? Selfish to drive you away from my thoughts? Am I thinking only about my memories? What about the ones who feel the same way about me, like how I feel for him? If this is called selfishness, then I am the most fucked up girl, I guess. Can I help it? Can I make myself understand that the heart is tired? Can I make myself understand that the body can’t take all these sufferings of the heart and the constant questionings in the head?  Or Am I just confused? Confused about my luckless romance..

The love of her life.....

Remembering the times when I told myself that, that was it; I shouldn’t look back and that I should forget him. It’s been years and that should be enough time to put a closure on something that never happened fully.  Maybe I was right back then, but could never get myself to allow what I told myself. Then maybe I would have recovered, recovered from all the heartbreak and the trauma, I had to go through. Your disappearing act broke me into pieces. Every time you disappeared I felt as if you fed me needles. I know the needles will only pain me, but I was so in love with you, I happily ate those needles; felt every bit of pain, every wound that it carved, made me fall for you.

Now that I look back, I feel terribly sad for that girl, who was so crazy for you. Crazy about the way you looked at her, crazy about the smile you gave when she looked at you, crazy about the moments when you told you loved her, crazy about the feelings she felt when you touched her, crazy about every bit of you. She fell crazy in love with you when you told her, that even though you couldn’t stay with her then, you had a long way to go and that things will turn all good. Little did you know the kind of emotions you were developing into her? It hurts to see that girl falling for you, every time you came back to her life. It didn’t matter, who she was with, where she was and what she was supposed to do; all she knew and saw and loved was you.

It burns me to see that girl, asking and questioning herself about why you and she were not official in Facebook when all the other girls you dated had that tag on. Every time she saw your page, she cried her heart out but could never question you. She fisted her heart again and again and stopped herself from the entire trauma. Geared up and tried to forget you. Forced herself to move on and she finally thought she did. She thought she was happy and even though you crossed her mind, she knew she had to move on and she did. Then you resurfaced yourself again and nothing else mattered; she yearned for your love. Even though she knew that this too would be short lived; your presence was what mattered to her. She knew she couldn’t make you stay, so, she loved you, however, she could. She knew she was dragging herself to hell, but she was stupid, so stupid that nothing else mattered to her. She knew tomorrow you’ll be gone and might never come back to her life again. That moment of happiness was what she craved for. She didn’t care about what people would say, her eyes longed for you and her heart loved you.

If you were the one, seeing what she would do when she missed you. You would know that there will never come another girl who would love you like she did. It pains my heart now to see, how she would force herself into reading inspirational books, just to keep her strong and happy. She wanted to show you how happy she was without you but, her heart always failed her.  Her heart failed her every time you crossed her mind and she melted every time you resurfaced in her life.

It makes me feel like pulling out my lungs, kidney, intestines and every possible part of my body to know that, that girl was me. You just tossed me aside like a scratch book, which you use only when you want to solve your problems or distract you from your issues in life. I know we didn’t need farewells and closure to bring an end to what I thought we had, because as far as I remember we hadn’t opened a door.  I would never know what we really had. Was it only one-sided? Why couldn’t you carry me to the other side of the fence where everything was beautiful? What was stopping you? We never acted liked friends; we kissed whenever we had the chance as if we were running out of time. You use to hold my hand so tightly that made me think, how can a person like you leave me stranded all alone.  Neither you nor can I deny the warmth we felt in each other's arms; the passion even though short-lived can never be replaced by anyone.

I don’t know whether I should blame you or blame myself, but enough of all the blame games. Because what we had was nothing anyway. I had no rights nor could I claim you as mine, but the fact that I gave you everything and you are and will always be the love of my life.

Crazy little thing call love.

A lot of people might think "dude, that girl is crazy!! " , but if you look around there are thousands of girls like me, who have this weird, crazy, mixed feelings. 

Some say and express it and some just hide it under their sleeves. People are not so outspoken, that I have started believing, I am only crazy one around.

I have a lot of friends, who have been in relationships for like 100 years. They have been with their partners for like ages and are still lovey Dovey. I use to think, probably these people are just trying to show off. Little did I know, that these stupid people are actually in love. Who else can understand this term better than me! 

Trust me, stupid is not the word!! I should probably start inventing a new word for myself!! A word that can describe me! 

I am not a bitch nor am I a slut of any kind. They are humans too and that's their job. I don't think anyone should underestimate them. They are into this profession either by choice or by circumstances. Guess, I am drifting apart again like I always do.

Well, coming back to what I was saying, I am not a bitch or a slut. I am just a normal person, who has loved, loved like crazy. Yes, again I am going to say this; there are people out there who's loved more than me and have had the best and worst experiences no one could ever imagine.

At times, I ask myself, Is it perfectly alright to be happy with one person and still miss someone else? Is is ok, to be dating someone, still at times catch up with that special someone? Is is ok, to break up with someone, just to be with that special someone. Until you realise that, it's not even worth it!! Could I be any more stupid?? 

They say that, once in a lifetime, there will come a guy, who will sweep you away with his charm and you will go head over heels and that's it! End of the story!! 

I have dated other guys too, and this person messed me up. It was a choice I know, but I was naive and stupid! Even though he hurt me like a trillion of times, I always got carried away the moment he said hi...well, The hi always ended up with my heart crushed like KFC's tastiest crusher. Well, that's pretty stupid but it was beautifully crafted stupid types!! 

I messed up too, but I thought, he might want to clean the mess. That's what lovers do right? I kept messing and losing myself until I got tired and waved ta ta bye bye for good. 

People might think that our love was one sided, but trust me when I say this, there was something. I am not saying this to ease my heart but I firmly remember him asking me, why do I love him so much? And my reply was, I don't know... I was scared, scared of losing him but he kept assuring me, that we have a long way to go and I shouldn't be afraid.  

He was not just a guy I was fooling around with, my feelings were real whether or not his were, I will never know. But know that mine were - totally.   It was really mean of him to put me in a grey situation all the time because I didn't know exactly, who or what I was in his life? 

People say moving on is easy. No.... Never.. It's all crap! Moving on from what we had is like, cutting someone with a blunt knife. This is going to take a lifetime, but don't get me wrong. I have moved on like literally moved on. There are times when I suddenly miss him but that's how life is right. It is indeed a long, messed up one-way road everyone has to travel someday or the other. 

It's always hard to imagine living without the person you thought you loved the most.

 At times, I look forward to the day when we cross our paths. We might talk or even act like strangers. I don't  know. But whatever and however the situation is, we will no longer be the same people.  Loving him was rather a lesson than a mistake because he taught me that I am capable of giving all my heart to someone else- and I will always be thankful for that.

Fashionara...★★★

What really is ★fashion★? Is it the ever changing trends or something that one is really comfortable in? Well, to me, it could be clothing, footwear, accessories, makeup, as well as the prevailing styles in behavior.  When it comes to fashion, I always play with fantasy, frenzy of colors and glamour.

Every season, trend in fashion changes, this is why, we want our wardrobe to compliment. Every individual possess their own way of grooming themselves. There are different kinds of people when it comes to fashion. There are the ones who pick up the latest trend, good or bad, ‘just flaunt it’ types. There are some people who craze about brands, same goes with these kinds of people; ‘it’s beautiful because you paid 4-5 grand on a shirt'? I mean how on earth these can be considered fashion? Everybody wants to look their best but sometimes it is such a waste of money when we actually end up spending so much on clothes and cosmetics that don’t fit or worse, when it make us look extremely bad.

Of course you can’t just wear shorts or a skimpy dress to a college in India; I mean it’s totally out of question.  There has to be dresses for different occasions.  A simple pair of jeans with a tee could do wonders, if worn the right way and if you are comfortable in it, BAMMM! ★★★ There you go! Now that the weather's getting lovelier, well, supposedly, we are naturally making the appropriate adjustments to our wardrobes. Clothing and accessories with Aztec prints are trending and are the hottest now all across the world. The print itself is so catchy that one can always ditch the accessories to avoid looking tacky. 

♥Aztec prints on dresses, swimming costume, accessories and even nails are a must this season for a dose of tribal coolness, and I can’t get enough, and so will you!!

I personally think that it should be an offence, if you do not indulge your tootsies in the liberty of a thong sandal or flip flop, and college is the place to do it. It’s trendy, comfortable and at the same time cheap. Well, that’s because you can always match play with colors with that of your dress.

We buy fashion magazines to check out the latest season of clothing, keeping an eye on the changing trends so that we somehow can be the first to dress the latest styles. That is how we catch up the new fashion updates and imply it on us. However, many men stick to buying clothing that comes with any style or prints and stick to it. Nevertheless, men are getting equally turning fashion conscious like their female counterparts. While new trend keep popping every now and then, menswear fashion is all set, and will see more evolution in the near future as well. So hold on guys, the best is yet to come, unless you want to experiment on yourself.... :P

Colors play a great role when we talk about fashion sense. In fact, the colors that one attires decide how fashionable they are! You need not flaunt bright and glittery dresses all the time to be categorized “stylish". Colorful clothing and accessories always look fashionable and glamorous when balanced well. Choosing colors according to the season reveals our fondness for comfort in fashion. The ability to mix and match colorful clothes is an important aspect of having good fashion sense. I always experiment with different colors. Colors and fashion go hand in hand! Colors have the power to alter moods. The fashion world modifies every single day and at times it is necessary to get rid of the old to make room for the new.

The boring 'Plain Jane' looks needs to be hidden in a Pandora box. This spring grab those colorful flip flops and wedges, printed pants, bright colors, soft fabrics, casual Capri and a fusion of western and traditional attires by flaunting all you can and stay beautiful and stylish…. ★★★★★★

Mysore

The moment I think of Mysore, I start to portray a beautiful picture in my mind, of the beautiful royal palaces and the very famous silk saris.  Sandalwoods are synonymous with Mysore and it lends a beautiful charisma to the city. Presently, it is Karnataka state’s second largest city and only 130 kilometres splits Mysore from the cosmopolitan city of Bengaluru.

The best time to visit Mysore is during October and November as the weather is at its most pleasant and the festival of Dussehra is celebrated in all its glory. The city is beautifully ornamented during this ten-day festival as it’s a huge affair here. At times, it gets crowded and becomes difficult to see around but I feel that’s the fun part of it.  Tourists from all across India and abroad come to Mysore during this time to witness the magnificent festivities.

Mysore was rated the second cleanest city in India in 2010 and the cleanest in Karnataka.

Mysore Palace was said to have been built nearly 1000 years ago. The palace contains both Hindu and Muslim styles and has Saracen, Dravidian, Roman and Oriental styles to it. Mysore palace is now one of the most famous tourists’ attractions in India after Taj Mahal. Today, the palace has been converted into a museum that houses imaginative collectibles and treasures, a unique collectible that is brought out only during the Dussehra festival is a 750-kilogram golden throne. The palace is at its stunning best on Sundays when around 96,000 bulbs light the palace upon its exterior. Believe me, that once in a lifetime experience is something that cannot  be forgotten easily.

 The other must see places in Mysore are the Karanji Lake, Philomena’s Church and the Jaganmohan Palace. Boat rides are something you must not miss when you visit the Karanji Lake. Moreover, this place also contains a wonderful butterfly and aviary park waiting to greet us.

Philomena’s Church is Beautiful and stunning glass paintings depicting the birth of Jesus Christ, his last supper, his suffering, his resurrection and his ascension prettify the walls of Philomena’s Church.

The Jaganmohan Palace was built in the year 1861 and a unique aspect of this palace is that it houses paintings painted in the traditional Mysore Golden leaf style.

Mysore often gets a bit sunny and one can’t possibly walk around but to worry. The auto-walas are friendly and one can easily communicate with them either in blunt English and sometimes Hindi if one has a problem speaking with the local language. There are many cab operators located throughout the city, whether you want to travel inside Mysore, or get on further- say to, Bylakuppe(one of my favourite) or back to Bangalore by car.

I remember clearly it hardly took us an hour to reach the beautiful town and engulf the beauty of the masterpiece, the golden temple. Bylakuppe is a small town located in the west of the Mysore district.

The town consists of a number of agricultural settlements / small camps close to each other and has a number of monasteries, nunneries, and temples in all the major Tibetan Buddhist traditions. The occupancy has slowly improved from a small village into a clean town. The weather is really good and one can move around, bargaining for beautiful silver chains and souvenirs for friends and relatives.

My fifth year in Mysore and this place still evokes curiosity in me. Mysore has about 180 parks and playgrounds. People prefer to walk around the many lakes which pepper the landscape like the central Kukarahalli Kere by the university where the beautiful journey around is about 4.5 kilometres.

And what better way to soak in Mysore than indulge in Mysore’s traditional breakfasts in Nalpad and mid-day meals in hotel RRR! Whether a steaming hot “dosa” with “sambhar” and a variety of “chutneys”, or that complete rice based South Indian meals with “Mysore Pak” for dessert, there’s no better way to learn Mysore than through your tongue!